The Dick world premiere screening

Larry Cowan
14 April 2016
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, there's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti. No, this isn't a rap battle. This is Mark and Mark is afraid to talk to girls. Very afraid. He's had one too many nights with his pants around his ankles watching the naughty channels his mum tried to block. Enough is enough and he's ready for change, he's ready to grab life by the balls.
They say the journey of a thousand miles begins with one small step, but this advice is useless for Mark because he doesn't want to walk a thousand mile journey, he isn't an ultra-marathon long distance walker. What a silly piece of advice. Silly silly, oprah-esque, rubbish. Garbage. Filth. Smut. The Dick, see y'all on Sunday.